Okay, so I want to keep being as transparent as I can be about this whole adoption process and the thoughts and feelings that accompany it. Today that means sharing with you that everything in me wants to DO something, to find a way to end the wait of not knowing. To know whether we will be opening up our home for always to Samuel and Caleb...or to 2 children who are nameless and faceless to us right now...but were written out long before the world was created to be our children.
I am a "fixer" type of person. I see a problem or hear about a problem and immediately my brain starts spinning looking for a solution...for a plan of action. And my flesh is screaming at me right now telling me to DO SOMETHING!!!! COME UP WITH A PLAN!!!
I feel a bit like the Israelites must have felt as they were parked by the sea watching the Egyptians approaching: helpless and able to do nothing but watch. Sadly, they turned to grumbling and anger (and I'll share more about that tomorrow) and gave us all an example to NOT follow (although, I have a strong suspicion their sin would have been mine as well... as it often is). In the midst of this, there is one verse that hit me afresh: "The Lord will fight for you while you keep silent." Exodus 14:14. WOW!!!
This word "silent" does not mean doing nothing...but what it does mean is that ALL I NEED TO DO is place my hope and trust in the One to Whom all of Heaven and Earth does His bidding. It's to rest in the knowledge that I serve the Sovereign One: the One who has the right, the wisdom and the power to do as He pleases...and He always wins every battle! And, in that, my plans are dissolved, the "fight" in me is quieted, and I am left with a quiet expectation... and with a deeper understanding of the word's in Psalm 46:10, "Be still and know that I am God."
I am a "fixer" type of person. I see a problem or hear about a problem and immediately my brain starts spinning looking for a solution...for a plan of action. And my flesh is screaming at me right now telling me to DO SOMETHING!!!! COME UP WITH A PLAN!!!
I feel a bit like the Israelites must have felt as they were parked by the sea watching the Egyptians approaching: helpless and able to do nothing but watch. Sadly, they turned to grumbling and anger (and I'll share more about that tomorrow) and gave us all an example to NOT follow (although, I have a strong suspicion their sin would have been mine as well... as it often is). In the midst of this, there is one verse that hit me afresh: "The Lord will fight for you while you keep silent." Exodus 14:14. WOW!!!
This word "silent" does not mean doing nothing...but what it does mean is that ALL I NEED TO DO is place my hope and trust in the One to Whom all of Heaven and Earth does His bidding. It's to rest in the knowledge that I serve the Sovereign One: the One who has the right, the wisdom and the power to do as He pleases...and He always wins every battle! And, in that, my plans are dissolved, the "fight" in me is quieted, and I am left with a quiet expectation... and with a deeper understanding of the word's in Psalm 46:10, "Be still and know that I am God."
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