One thing Bryan and I have desired to do is to be transparent about our adoption. And that means sharing with you both the joys and the hurts. Today, my heart hurts.
The Ethiopian government wants the boys' mother (who left them at the orphanage in May of 2008 and has become a house servant) to take the children back. She says that she is HIV positive and cannot take care of them. If she is HIV postive, the government would not send the boys back to her. They are testing her this week.
I said in the beginning that my heart hurts, and it does. I dream about them, picture them being a part of so many things that we do and have images of their mannerisms and smiles often floating around in my head...I can't help but smile right now just thinking about them. So, yes, my heart hurts.
But that is just a part of what my heart is doing right now. It's also resting in peace. God did not go on a vacation, He is not asleep. Nothing will happen without the Lords decree and His work is perfect (Deut. 32:4). My heart is also hopeful. Not necessarily hopeful in the situation but in the God who holds the situation in His hands! "For You are my Hope; O Lord God, You are my confidence from my youth (Psalm 71:5).
We do not know how to pray but, "Your will be done." Bryan and I would love nothing more than to have the boys reunited with their mom (though our hearts would hurt like crazy). But we also have arms and hearts open wide to bring them into our home for always! So, right now we choose to rest in the promise of I Corinthians 2:9, "Things which eye has not seen and ear has not heard, and which have not entered the heart of man, all that God has prepared for those who love Him."
Would you please pray with and for us and for all those involved?
Comments
"The little worries which we meet each day May lie as stumbling blocks across our way, Or we may make them stepping stones to be of grace, O Lord, to Thee." A E Hamilton
"Source of my life's refreshing springs, Whose presence in my heart sustains me, Thy love ordains me pleasant things, Thy mercy orders all that pains me." A.L. Waring
What a precious moment...I just had to share it with you!
My heart hurts for you and your family as well as for the boys' mother. What you all must be going through?! What a blessing to know that God loves you all and will do all things for His glory. We love you all very much.
I can't imagine how hard it is. I am praying that God prepares you for whatever is best for you and the boys. I pray that God works in the Ethiopian government to get everything figured out quickly. I pray for the boys mother, who is trying to do what is best for her children. That her heart is comforted and that she is able to trust in the Lord as you do. I pray that you are able to trust completely and have faith that those boys will be in the best place for them to glorify God, no matter where that may be. And mostly I pray that God gives you comfort and a heals your hurt heart quickly. Love you guys!