Eighteen Years Ago...God Gave Us You

Dear Micah,

The journey God took us on to arrive at this day, eighteen years ago, was full of joy, tears, hope, gut-wrenching pain, laughter, relief, confusion, wonder, peace, brokenness and healing.

God used your older brother, Garett, to help grow us up a little bit more...sanctify us...and help prepare us to be the parents that welcomed you into the world on October 3rd, 2000 at 4:11 a.m.
After his death, my womb felt so very empty, our arms ached to hold him whom we never would this side of glory, and our hearts felt a brokenness they had never known before. But, in the midst of that pain, our hearts were more full than they had ever been. We had drank deeply of the steadfast love of the Lord. We were infused with His peace that passes understanding. We rested in His sovereign goodness and clung to His perfect purposes and plan. We walked through the valley and we learned there was nothing to fear because we were safe in the arms of our Savior.

By God's grace, it was those two people that held you in the wee hours of the morning eighteen years ago. Oh, how we rejoiced that morning; I wish you could have seen it with eyes that understood. We had waited for you, prayed for you and even thought we lost you early on, and then at 15 weeks when they couldn't find your heartbeat. And we were pretty convinced you were coming early at 33 weeks. A week in a Pittsburgh Hospital, followed by weeks of bedrest and medication, were the "servants" the Lord used to keep you tucked away safely in my womb. You still came 3 weeks early...you know the story well.

I was off of bedrest and we went out to celebrate Garett's life and even his death...as we knew and still know he is whole and perfect in Heaven now. Dinner and a movie..."Remember the Titans" had just come out in the theater...and we were both suckers for a good sports movie! Halfway through the movie my contractions started coming...and coming with regularity. Call it stupidity, call it hilarity ...but money was tight and the movie was great...so we decided to stick it out and headed straight for the hospital once it was over. :) You'll never have to wonder why you enjoy football so much!

You arrived 6 hours later. Just typing this out, my eyes are filling with tears. They told us you might have Down syndrome...you didn't...but you would have been welcomed, loved and adored no matter what. Oh Bud, you were so tiny and so beautiful (if I may call you that): six pounds, eight ounces. As I've said before, if ever anyone had a "life verse," Micah 6:8 is yours.

We marveled over every part of you. Watched you breathe with thankful hearts. Listened to you cry with awe. The Lord had seen fit to "take away" just a year earlier, but as the sun began to rise upon that new day, our hearts rose up in praise for what He had given, for who He had blessed us with...our hearts cried out in praise for the gift of YOU!

Son, our hearts still rejoice in the gift of you. I no longer look down at you...you've surpassed even your dad in height. And I can no longer hold you in my arms like I did long ago...but you'll always be held close in my heart. The future may be uncertain and God's plan for you might still seem fuzzy...but His will for you is clear. He has shown you, my son, what is good and what He requires from you, "to act justly, to love faithfulness and to walk humbly with your God" Micah 6:8. Your dad and I pray that you will always, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not rely on your own understanding; think about Him in all your ways, and He will guide you on the right paths."  Proverbs 3:5-6

The journey God took us on to get to that day, eighteen years ago, was full of pain we would have run from, if we had a choice. It was filled with heartache that we would have avoided if it was up to us. But, praise God, it wasn't our decision to make. The pain and the heartache were instruments in the hands of our Redeemer to be used for our good, to shape and fashion us more into His glorious image. We had to learn that Jesus is enough; that even if He took everything from us...we would have all we needed to be content and satisfied..because we could never lose Him. He taught us so much through a season of weeping and then, quite literally, brought us a special joy in the morning...He gave us you! Micah, your journey will look different than ours, but I can assure you there will still be many trials on the road as well as many days of joy.  God has sustained you these 18 years...and He will be enough for you every year to come! He will hold you fast. Cling to Him always!

I look back on your life with thankfulness and I look forward with anticipation....

Happy 18th Birthday, Micah!

I'll always love you,
Mom


Comments

Talene said…
Happy Birthday Micah
What beautiful words from your mother, cherish her
Juli said…
Happy Birthday Micah from your former Librarian back when you lived in Rio Vista, Ms. Juli. I pray you have a blessed day.

Muddy said…
Hey Micah, I imagine you are quite the awesome kid these days. Perhaps you still play guitar now and then. It's one of those things that is almost always worth doing. Best wishes and prayers for your future successes. Warm regards from your old (not that old) guitar teacher in Yakima.
Kristin said…
Hi Mr. Lowry, Thanks so much for your message! It was really great to hear from you. I'm still plucking away...but not as much as you would probably want me to :) Hope you have a bunch of students...you are a great teacher and I still remember many of your lessons!